Accepting a travel healthcare assignment in a new city is an exciting time, especially if your significant other will be making the move with you! Moving to a new place with your main squeeze is an exhilarating opportunity, but it can also be a stressful and overwhelming transition. Your partner may feel concerned about having to become familiar with an entirely new place and may wonder how they’ll have a fulfilling life there. Anticipating these worries, however, can help make the move easier on both of you and set you up for success in your new home. Here are four tips for moving to a new city with your significant other:
1. Exercise Your Empathetic Listening SkillsMost important through this entire transition is to consistently ask questions and take the time to listen. Licensed clinical social worker and relationship expert Michael Batshaw, LCSW, says “the couples who stay the most stuck refuse to fully engage in the other person’s perspective.” The absolutely worst experience you could have is moving somewhere for 3 months and your partner feels isolated, unheard, and disconnected. We encourage you to stretch your communication skills, ask a lot of questions, and listen with empathy to their perspective. How could you go wrong when you put your partner’s concerns at the forefront of your own concerns?
You may have a clear understanding of what your job situation will be like once you arrive in your new home, but you should also do research in this area for your significant other. It’s important that you focus on the facts instead of looking at the move with rose colored glasses. For example, you shouldn’t reassure your partner that there are ample job opportunities for them if you really have no idea if this is the case. Learn about job vacancies and companies that are hiring in your new city that aligns with your significant other’s field of work or look into a remote job for them. Researching the ideal place to live if you both work in the new city or how to best commute will help prevent stress when you’re in a new location. If your partner opts not to work during your contract, then it’s important to research activities they’ll enjoy while you’re at work.
The next step is to compile all your research into a spreadsheet, word document, or even a task building app where your partner can quickly and easily feel included in the decisions and plan their own path.
You can help mitigate feelings of one-sidedness in a move by treating the discovery of your new home as a shared endeavor! Since you’re already in a job, you’ve already started building a community, which can make your partner feel more disconnected if they haven’t quite settled in yet. This is when you have to plan ahead. Do things like regularly scheduled dates to explore your neighborhood, eat at a new restaurant, go on a day trip, take a class together, or participate in a local community event. This can help strengthen your relationship by underlining the commitment you have to sharing the adventure of becoming more comfortable in your new home, as well as being something you both can look forward to each week.
If your partner is quitting their job to move with you, it can be uncomfortable for them to not provide any or as much financial support as they’re used to providing in the relationship. Establishing whether or not they will need to work will help avoid your favorite person feeling pressured and overwhelmed to take any job they find. Building up some savings ahead of the move can help give your partner more of the freedom and time they need to find a rewarding job in their new home and can help decrease feelings of frustration and resentment. A savings safety net will help with any last-minute contract cancellations you may experience as well.